Here are a couple of points that I would make...
Kramer stepped over the line. Getting into Graves' face and chewing him out is one thing. The shove and then his making the alpha male move to go out of his way to step over Graves are both way out of line.
That said, Graves is a student athlete, a member of a team. I believe he was embarrassed (I fall short of calling it humilated) by the coach's actions. But I believe he threw his team mates, coaches and school under the bus when he stepped over the line by pursuing the matter in way that he chose. In my opinion, someone, either the player, his parents, this attorney or some combination sees an opportunity, whether it's money, publicity or whatever, and is using this incident as a springboard to cash in on that opportunity. From listening to the attorney, he's waiting for the investigations to be completed in order to use the findings to enhance his upcoming civil case. If the investigations lead to disciplinary actions, he's got that evidence to inject into his case. If the investigations don't result in disiplinary actions, he'll add to his list of defendants. I don't believe it's a matter of "if" there is a civil case filed against Kramer and the school, it's a matter of "when". In short, Graves' decision to address the issue as he did is a detriment to anyone associated with the team and the school.
What would I do if I were Tingey? First, I'd suspend the coach for a game or two and put him on a short leash. As for Graves, I'd see that he is not allowed on the field, whether he's released to play by doctors or not. His attorney is looking for a guarantee of his client's safety before he rejoins the team which Kramer, Tingey and ISU cannot guarantee. This is NCAA football, not checkers, hopscotch or as someone put it, ballroom dancing. So meet the demands of the attorney, give Graves a seat in the stands and let him be a spectator.
Finally, I would add that the majority of what is being discussed is Graves' point of view. Who's to say that ISU didn't begin investigating the incident when Graves contacted the school? The school has been silent and will probably continue to be so until their investigation is complete. This is standard policy. I don't see a problem with that.